slower

Slightly edited email to a friend who sent me the first section of the article here (though I would ordinarily be extremely wary of anything from an astrology site, this is pretty well written and it did provoke my thought...).

Mentally pooped just now; this is probably incoherent (just lots of work, not enough sleep, and my wrist hurts from mouse overuse, sob…). But yes. I have to admit that the hard-edged, incisive cynic has some sort of attraction. And while I remain averse to trite, gratuitous, mawkish sentimentalism, I do often think things wouldn’t be nicer if people would be more damn positive about stuff.

I think there’s a place for skepticism if not cynicism though. Because I think a lot of the things that a lot of the people regard as good and positive revolve around ideas that have been sold to us by faceless corporations who just want our money.

I also sometimes feel like I really fail to live the way I think I should – fail to prioritise the things I think are truly important. Friends, family, community – all those hippie things. And right now I feel completely info-overloaded. I love books. I want to read lots of books before I die. I think in the last 2 months I’ve read about 3 pages of the book I’ve been reading for the last… 6 months? More? Partly it’s because I’ll almost always say yes to meeting friends before staying home and reading, but partly it’s because by the time I get to bed I’m so shagged that I don’t have the energy. And I’ve had so much information fly at me all day – some of it is interesting and/or relevant but an awful lot of it goes in the if-I-never-saw-it-my-life-would-be-no-poorer basket (actually my life would be richer for having not seen it, if only for the time that would save). I really feel time-poor just now. The whole downshifting / slower life thing appeals in many ways. Sometimes I’m not sure why I’m not a student in Melbourne, spending too long over coffee with friends.

I think this sounds much more negative than it would if I weren’t tired. Despite being hard on myself at times, I really do think of myself as positive. Maybe this is delusion, but I think it.