How high?

Just saw one of the other two candidates for the job I applied for. It's a new position at the organisation at which I'm already working.

I had my interviews yesterday and Tuesday. I think I went OK. I probably convinced everyone that I was capable of jumping to requested heights. I wore a tie on Tuesday – amazing how much impact this has when you wear one about once a year. I swear everybody I know who saw me made a comment. I dress casual for 1.5 years then spend a day looking “business-like” (ie, wearing restrictive, hot clothing in a tropical climate) and that’s supposed to make me more suitable for the job. I know I should get over this (it’s very angry-late-teens) but it’s hard not to think about how ridiculous it is.

Job interviews – and the associated morph into an institutional yes-man – make me want to move to Nimbin and grow organic vegetables and pot.

The new guy looked about my age and quite slick. I saw him leaving the coffee shop with my old boss / chair of the selection committee, and my first reaction was, "ooohh, he's good! He'll probably get it."

I'm maybe not as worried about this as I should be. I should be excited and anxious about the prospect of what is a decent, big-career-step-forward position. But I'm not. Part of me thinks not getting it would be the kick in the arse I need.